I prided myself on not having a birth plan. I wanted to go into labor with an open mind and with no expectations I wouldn't be disappointed and let me just tell you... thank gosh I had that mind set because what did happen would definitely not have been any part of any plan I could have possibly had in mind.
Even without a "plan" I had imagined my labor and had an idea of how I thought it would go. I was 60/40 on getting an epidural leaning towards having one because my doctor, who is awesome, does them, so I knew I would be in good hands, and I was positive I'd have a vaginal delivery. My husband and I talked about and dismissed the possibility of a cesarean deciding I just wouldn't have to have one. I skipped over the c-section part of every book or blog I read. I guess the one true fault in my non-plan was not planning the possibility of a cesarean.
This is how it all went down.
I asked for a membrane sweep at 39 weeks which was Friday April, 17th. That night at around 3am I got up to pee and lost a big chunk of my mucus plug. Then nothing until the next Thursday when I started having contractions that I could easily walk and breathe through, but were too painful to sleep and I was sure they would get stronger, so I stayed up til 5am pacing and breathing and googling when to know when labor would really start when all of a sudden they just stopped... I couldn't believe it I was exhausted and so frustrated and to top it all off I had the worst cold of my life with the most nagging dry cough.
The next day April 24 was my due date and we went to the doctor and got a 2nd sweep and that night I lost more mucus and my "bloody show". Saturday came and I went to bed feeling that things could happen soon and I was right. At 2am I woke up and when they say when you're in labor you will know, you know. The contractions this time were much stronger and while my husband slept I did my best to pace and breathe. Kyle woke up around 6am and he took care of me making sure I had water and healthy snacks and played relaxing music until around 10am when we decided it was time to go to the hospital.
When we got there the nurse told me I was only 1cm I was so devastated since I had going through contractions for eight hours already and I was sure they would send us home, but the monitors reported my contractions coming fast and hard, so my doctor came in and when he checked me he said I was 3cm, so he decided I should stay. An hour later I was almost 6cm and because things were moving along so quickly he decided we should break my water. That's when the contractions got super painful, so I decided to get an epidural and it was AMAZING. I felt zero pain and could still walk to get up to use the washroom, so Kyle and I just hung out and waited. When I got to be almost 10cm with just a lip left to dilate I could tell something was changing because I could feel the contractions and some pain again. They told me when I felt the need to push and pressure to tell them, but I never felt any sensation like that at all. I thought maybe it was because of the epidural, but little did I know it was because baby was not far enough in my birth canal.
I pushed, and pushed, and pushed. She was stuck on my pelvic bone and she was face up and oh my gosh was it painful. Apparently epidurals don't get rid of bone pain. Everyone was yelling PUSH and I tried and tried every position and then they tried every vacuum thing, but nothing was working. The pain got so bad that I started puking after every contraction and shaking and couldn't really breathe through the contractions anymore, so they gave me some oxygen and aother Doctor came in and tried another type of vacuum thing to pull her out and it didn't work. I pretty much started begging for a c-section and couldn't wait another minute to get a spinal and have no more pain.
This is where not having a birth plan saved me. It was chaos. It was shift change, so the room was full of nurses, I was in so much pain, and my poor husband was beside himself helpless watching the whole terror of the day unfold with no control. If I sound dramatic, it was.
I got the spinal and was just so out of it from that point on I didn't care about much else than not being in pain anymore it was all such a blur and once they started operating on me my body went into shock and my jaw and arms started shaking and trembling so bad that I thought I was going to break my teeth off. To top it all off my sweet baby was too big to fit through the incision and she tore my uterus. She wasn't breathing when she came out because of the mucus in her lungs, so they whisked her off to get that out and it hurt her vocal cords a bit they said and her head was scabbed and bruised pretty bad from all the suctioning, but she was out and in the world with us. It sounds bad and weird to admit it, but I could only ask my husband if she was okay and when he said yes that's all I could care about. Kyle held her next to me while they sutured up my uterus and put 13 staples in my stomach and then we went off to recovery. I was still shaking and in shock, so I couldn't even really process the fact that we had our baby. I stayed there for a while getting my blood pressure back up that had dropped really low and then I had to go off for an X-Ray which is standard for emergency C-sections to make sure nothing is left inside you. Except they forgot to do it right after surgery, so they waited until my medications wore off and it was hell to have to be rolled onto a stretcher and taken down when I could feel everything again. By the time I got back to my room I was pretty much begging for pain meds again.
Scotlyn Nikol Bailey 8lbs 1oz was born at 8:26pm and I didn't get back to my room and able to hold her until midnight. Kyle laid her down next to me and she latched right on and breastfed like she was born to do it. She slept on my chest that night and the next three consecutive nights we spent in the hospital. She developed jaundice because of the trauma to her head, but thankfully we were allowed to take her home after four nights in the hospital & her newborn screening tests came back with potential concern for her thyroid, but the re-testing results came back good, such a relief!
This is where I gotta really give my husband props. I had an IV, compression things on my legs, and was pretty much 100% useless and he did not leave my side. He slept on a fold out chair next to me, he helped me to the washroom, he did it all. I didn't leave my room for three days and he made sure I always had anything and everything I needed and helped me do everything I could to care for our baby. I was a mess and he was amazing. His parents also live on the same street as the hospital and would bring us food every day, so we didn't have to eat hospital food which was so nice!!
So, that's pretty much it! Despite the fact that it was the worst day of my life, it was also the best day and it's true when they say you'll forget because I would hands down get pregnant again tomorrow if I thought my body could handle it haha. We have so much love for our girl and I am so excited to add more munchkins to our home!! My next pregnancies will have to be done by cesarean too because of the tear to my uterus and they said I will only be able to have maybe two more pregnancies, but I know each one is a blessing, so we will take each one as it comes!!
